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REAL LIFE – The first step is to accept that your physical state and emotions play a large role in the way you live with current stress every day. These will not be going away.
STRESS SCALE – Takes less than 1 minute – these key words are already in your brain and are the way to create new responses. The brain is the body as one amazingly integrative system which is full of useful information.
What do I feel?
The physical check should be quick with words you know from experience: Cold fingers, empty stomach, tense shoulders…
Now, add in behavioral aspects; in a rush, slow, not ready,
Add emotional elements: unhappy, worried, ready to roll, confused, etc…
Morning – rushed, cold, cranky, slow, picky, tired
Mid Day – unsettled, cramped neck, confused
Late Afternoon- energized, happy, revved up, loose
Before Bed – relaxed, happy, cozy, warm, satisfied
This total of 4 minutes a day is amazingly simple – unless you have no time… too busy, got to finish, haven’t started, not good enough, too stressed. All feelings you could capture and make use of!
MAKE TIME TO STEP INTO STRESS – so you can find you way out.
The theme behind your adaptive behavior to stress is key to working with what is happening now. You will see many versions of your theme and as many people say: “It is EVERYWHERE’… yes there are a thousand and one ways you react to try to manage stress…but they all make sense with your theme. the problem is that these adaptations are that they work really well in many areas of your life … but not all of them…
EXAMPLE:
Todd is a law student and has a sharp self-critical side: “His family motto is alive and well and he still feels the pressure from it. Mostly when he is studying for class ow working as an intern for a judge.
Stop wait – I am feeling stress and I need to know why and what. My biology is right here giving signals: feel jittery, unhappy, had a 4th cup of coffee.. any of these will do as a biomarker.
Check-In: – What is the theme? I can ALWAYS DO BETTER! “
“Of course I feel this way”. In fact, there are 1001 versions of this theme in his life: at home, at school, with family, with himself BUT… not with his friends.
Now what? I am the one who feels I haven’t done enough and has the same old headache. OK, What do I want for myself? To get a clear head mentally and physically.
I need to take care of this stress so that it doesn’t build up.
I could try…. stand up, move, find aspirin, and go walk around to clear my head. Now. Not later, don’t wait… stay in the moment!
It would be good enough to go walk for 15 minutes, get a coffee – my 2nd of the day – wait on the aspirin and read one more brief.
Themes are learned with and around other people – Go look through the biography worksheet. This theme works both for and against Todd. Sometimes he can do better and wants to – other times it isn’t really possible or he is satisfied with something for now… At the moment.
Prepare for Stress 