The theme behind your adaptive behavior to stress is a key to working with what is happening now.   You will see many versions of your theme and as many people say: ” Its EVERYWHERE’… yes there are a thousand and one ways you react to try to manage stress…but they all make sense with your theme. the problem is that these adaptations  is that they work really well in many areas of your life … but not all of them…


Todd is a law student and has a sharp self-critical side: “His  family motto is alive and well and he still feels the pressure from it. Mostly when he is studying for class ow working as an intern for a judge.

Stop wait – I am feeling stress and I need to know why and what. My biology is right here giving signals: feel jittery, unhappy, had a 4th cup of coffee.. any of these will do as a bio marker.
Check In:   – What is the theme?  I can ALWAYS DO BETTER! ”  

“Of course I feel this way”. In fact, there are 1001 versions of this theme in his life: at home, at school, with family, with himself BUT… not with his friends.

Now what?  I am the one who feels I haven’t done enough and has the same old headache. OK, What do I want for myself?  To get a clear head mentally and physically.

I need to take care of this stress so that it doesn’t build up.

I could try…. stand up, move, find an aspirin and go walk around to clear my head. Now. Not later, don’t wait… stay in the moment!

It would be good enough to go walk for 15 minutes, get a coffee – my 2nd of the day – wait on the aspirin and read one more brief.

Themes are learned with and around other people – Go look through the biography worksheet  This theme works both for and against Todd. Sometimes he can do better and wants to – other times it isn’t really possible or he is satisfied with something for now… In the moment.